


Gem Glow

by AphTeavana



Series: We - Are The Country Gems! [1]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crystal Gems (Steven Universe), Alternate Universe - Human, Amethyst Canada (Hetalia), Bismuth Cuba (Hetalia), Crystal Gems, Diamond Prussia (Hetalia), Foreign Language, Gemsonas - Freeform, Gemtalia, Homeworld Gems - Freeform, Human Cuba (Hetalia), Human Denmark (Hetalia), Human Spain (Hetalia), Mild Language, Nyotalia, Nyotalia Cuba (Hetalia), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pearl America (Hetalia), Slow To Update
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 09:43:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15482976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AphTeavana/pseuds/AphTeavana
Summary: As a fifteen year old hybrid on Earth, Maira never really had any insight into what her mother’s life was like. But now that she’s run into a gaggle of sentient space rocks she has the exact ‘database’ she needs to answer her questions.





	1. Ya’kno, as you do

**Author's Note:**

> Also known as “My friends and I rped a crackfic which I then edited the crap out of :)”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You ever make something so dumb but so good...

One would think that waking up at seven in the morning, fully rested with no help of your alarm, would begin a good day, a great day even. That, finding some of that good kush of teas in the back of the cabinet, is a miraculous blessing for a Monday morning breakfast. Having a refreshing walk to the local donut store she works at, be nice, considering it’s the first cool day in ages. A day where life is looking up and saying _Hey, you know what? You, deserve a break!_ and handing it over, just like that. That’s what Maira would like to think, but that’s not what’s happening anymore. No, no, because that would just be _toooo_ easy.

And of course the thing to disturb it all would be shouting, of all things, from weird, glimmering men.

“H-Hey now! Stay back I say- bACK I SAY!” The tall one, who’s skin tone looked like it was rivaling paper and _beating it_ , was screaming his head off and kicking sand everywhere.

“Don’t worry, my Diamond, I will fend off this ferocious beast for you!” Another white man with futuristic and fancy looking grey toned clothes shoves his right hand to his left arm and jumps in front of a slightly taller man with flailing limbs. He quickly retracts his hands now producing a long spear, with which he strikes his opponent with. The small said ‘beast’ being a poor blue-ish crab.

Maira watches them scamper across the beach, either trying to avoid the crap or attack it. She chuckles to herself before whispering, “The hell...” and strays away from her usual path to work and heads over to these two weirdos. This was absolutely too unusual to miss.

“Hey!” She waved at them, “You two!” The couple jump at her voice and spin towards her.

The one with the spear points at her chest with it, “You there, what is your malfunction?” He waves around his weapon and looked like was ready to charge her. _Oh my god, these are actually psychopaths._ She couldn’t help think it, they were.

The crazy one, she deemed, started running towards her. But she was quick enough on her feet to step aside at the last moment, letting him fall on his face in the sand with a nice, “Oof-“ He picks he head up to spit out all the ass he just ate.

She only spared him a second before looking to the other, taller, humanoid. “What’s up?” She tried, as she took in his appearance. Platinum hair, red eyes, an unbelievable height, and a deathly pale skin tone. _Abnormal, but..._ His clothes looked lavish and tailored to him specifically. _Well off._ She nodded at him in greeting.

He smiled brightly at her and threw his hands out. “Hello there, fellow huu-man! The good huu-man cycle we are having, yes?” His friend launch back up into the air and takes the short attention of them both.

Maira turns back to the Tol Boi, “Uh, yeah? I guess.” The Speary one pointed again at her chest, something like “hazardous” falling from his lips. She looks back at the giant, “Who are you guys? You’re new and that’s not something we get often here.”

Mr. Giant tilts his head like he’s trying to be bashful on purpose, “I, well, we are-“ Speary’s spear is stabbed into the air, “The Crystal Gems!” He helpfully supplies, “This is my Diamond, the best and most beautiful of them all!” The so-called Diamond blushes for real this time.

Cool name, “Really? You’re named Diamond?” She asks with a tilt of her head.

Apparently, Speary took that as ‘not harmful behavior’ and started yapping like a kid with a rock he was proud of to find, “Yup! Luminous White Diamond and I’m his Pearl~!” He shimmied up next to her, showing off his big round, smooth, white oval shaped gem on his left shoulder. That’s when Maira had to do a double take.

She grabs his arm and brought it closer to her face, and yeah, that was a giant gemstone attached to his skin. “Holy shit, this is an actual pearl! It’s humongous.”

He stepped backward acting all cool, even twirling his spear a bit. “Hen, yeah, just-ah a cool Pea-“ Thwak- “Ow!” Pearl lets go of his spear in favour of reaching for his throbbing head. He had hit himself with it, making Diamond chuckle to himself.

White Diamond rolled his eyes, “Pearl AlF374, be more careful. You’re just going to end up cracking yourself.” The Pearl pouted, even more so when that random number came up.

Maira shook her head about because there was no fucking way this was happening. Unconsciously she touched her chest, right over a ‘birthmark’ of her own. “Diamond do you have one as well? Is it actually a diamond?”

She gasped as he turned around to show off his back, a big white diamond sitting there between his shoulder blades. “Yeah, man. I’m the awesomest of all the Diamonds!” It was way bigger than the pearl on Pearl's shoulder and it's cut was something akin to what a jeweler would put in a ring. Although the point of his gem was aimed towards his neck while the facets faced downwards.

“Where are you from?” She demanded as she studied his back. The two looked at each other with pursed lips. Pearl started to look around frantically, avoiding her gaze. “Uh, well, you see-" Diamond tries to supply an answer but begins following Pearl's lead. He suddenly spots a billboard about a space museum on route ninety, "space, of course! We're from space." He seems proud of himself before his mind catches up with what he said, "Wait, stars, no-“

Pearl jabs his finger into his friend's side harshly, distraught at the answer as well, “My Diamond, we _are_ from space-“ Diamond pokes Pearls back, making noises to cover up his words, “Shhh, peasant!”

Maira watches them with a twinkle in her eyes as she gasps- more like swears- loudly, “You guys are aliens! Holy crow, you’re space rock aliens!” She was getting super excited. Never before has anything this amazing happened before.

“Whoa there, what’re you doing with your face?” The Diamond asks alarmed, his Pearl squirming closer to protect. Maira snorts at them. “I have one of those too! A gemstone.” And with that, their eyes grew to be the size of dinner plates.

“ _What_? But you’re organic! You are organic, aren’t you?” Pearl turns to his Diamond and whispers to him, “This is supposed to be a gem free place, right? _Right_??” The giant nods calmly and turns back to Maira.

He tilts his head a bit, hrmming. “Show it to us. I want to see.” The Pearl stood semi-behind his Diamond, peeking around his side. Maira complies and unbuttons her flannel and pulls off her work shirt, leaving her in a tank top that shows off the top part of her square chest gem. “Oh, my stars-“ He covers his mouth. “That’s a Bismuth gem!” Screams Pearl, pointing.

They both squish their heads together trying to get a better look at it. “My Diamond how is this possible?” Pearl whispers not-so-quietly. Diamond pokes her, “I don’t know? Human, I demand to know how have you done this!” Maira shrugs at them. She didn’t have a clue about it either, just knew that she was born with the strange gem passed down from her mother.

Eventually they back off, satisfied with all the scoping they did. But they were still baffled with this insane idea of a hybrid. “I will find out about whatever this means. You’re going to have to prove yourself as ultimately awesome though if you wish to bask in my presence!” She rolled her eyes. This guy was really into proclaiming how awesome he was, whether or not that was even relevant to the situation at hand. Wonder if that's a species-wide thing.

Suddenly, Maira remembers a much more appealing and appropriate question. “Wait a minute, why are you guys here anyway? Are you trying to play galactic hide and seek or something?”

Pearl pffts at that notion, “Nah, that’s on Tuesdays. We’re actually running away from the galactic empire that’s threatening to shatter us. Ya’kno, as you do!” Maira blinked a couple times at that, confused as fuck.

“No? No, you don’t? Like ever-“ but she was stopped by Diamond slapping her hand on the back, almost sending her down into the ground to eat ass.

“Oh yeah. Sure you do!” They both nodded at each other like the insane idiots Maira was sure they really were. She just shook her head and decided to call it a day.

Well, actually it’s seven in the morning, so, _Shit_. “Oh no, my shift! Matthías is going to fucking kill me- or well someone else by accident!” She hastily turns back to them and shoves her work shirt back over her tank and her flannel back over her work shirt. “I, uh- don’t leave town! Please!” She shouts at them.

Diamond shrugged his shoulders, “Wasn’t planning too, but sure.”

She breathes a sigh of relief and huffs it over to the boardwalk. But before she turns too far away she turns around while running and waves to them, “I want to know about everything gem! So don’t expect to disappear or anything!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not that thing ;)


	2. Rocks from space. Sure, why not?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maira works at the big doughnut, Matthias is late as always, and the Gems get names

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back to cracktalia, how are you this fine day

“Uuugh.” It's a deep, guttural sound. One that will wake you from a nightmare but leaving you in an even worse state.

Maira rolls her heads onto the clerk counter, bored out of her fucking mind. It's not even two and she craves death. She wants to waste the day the day on her phone but the wifi is sketchy and no one's ever seen it pull off more than a bar plus going into the back to watch TV is no bueno just on the fact that if someone comes in the front she could get fired on skipping work.

So she settles for sniffing the counter, maybe hallucinate that, where ever this white stuff came from, it was cocaine. Wow, this surface sure looks nice. It’s grey, and sticky, and dull, and sticky, and powdered with a fuckton of sugar, and stick- _bing bong_ goes the front door.

Ripping her head up and quickly plastering a ‘the customer is always right!’ smile, Maira greets whoever decided to come in at this hour. “Welcome to the Big Donut, where we have all your doughnut-y needs!” She repeats the corporate slogan. The 'customer' comes in with their music pumping loudly liek the dingus he is.

“Uh! Uh-uh! Yeah! Oh-“ It was _fucking Matthias_. Of course it was. And of course, Maira throws an empty coffee container at him.

He drops what he was carrying in favour of blocking the plastic container from his face with a shriek. Which snaps the headphones he was wearing off, sliding them down his neck onto his shoulders. He looks at her when he's done freaking, “Sup?” The growl coming from Maira’s throat was practically lethal on its own.

She picks up a plastic fork and waves it around threateningly, “Please, please, _please_ , tell me it did not take you an entire hour _just_ to pick up a delivery of three, now smashed, pastries!”

He scoops them up and threw a disarming wave at her bashfully. “Chill, man.” Strutting over to her.

“I’ll chill when it’s your funeral-“ She threatens and Matthias drops the boxes onto the counter, shoving away a pop-up poster, and opens the top package.

“Look, see? They’re all good,” He smiles at her and opens the next one. It looks okay too. The next one is when he spots more than a few with splayed fillings, “for the most part!” Maira rests her elbows on the counter and leans on her hands again breathes out he frustration and long boredom. Whatever, because honestly who even cared. These would last them the rest of the week anyway. It’s a small town. Like, really really small.

"Hey, if the delivery truck guy didn't get pulled over then none of this would have ever happened!" He throws his arms up, and technically he's right but Maira refuses to let him win. So she just ignores him for now.

They take a package each and stock those into the display case beneath the counter, then take the last one to the back room refrigerators for a later restock. It's not Wednesday but they go over the inventory of everything else to waste their time.

”Napkins?” ”Seven.” He holds up three of the packets.

”Coffee beans?” ”At least eight.” Kicks a tub of ground beans aside.

”Lion Lickers?” ”Sixteen.” Knocks on the side of the freezer.

”Cups?” ”Two- no, three packets.” He remembers seeing another bag of them somewhere.

”Straws?” ”An entire Mouthful.” Wait...

Turning towards him she raises a sharp eyebrow at him in sass, ”That isn't a unit, Matthias.” He nods in agreement. She shakes her head at him and scratches a random number in for her straws’ column.

They come back to the front and make sure the soda machine works. The pesky thing always had a vengeance for fizzing out and exploding syrup all over its insides and whoever was nearby. Maira sits on the counter next to the heathen while she watches the machine run itself into another patch. Heathen Matthias sticks his gloved hand inside the nozzle again and feels around for _whatever_. When he makes an _aha_ noise he pulls back out takes the plastic cup Maira has on hand for him. Pushing it against the lever, he lets the soda drain into the cup. _And that's where hell visits._

The machine makes the scariest thump they've heard yet. They look at each other in slow, silent horror. It grinds the soda to a stop. The mixture that did make it out after the initial warning looking foul. The nozzle Matthias was pulling away from was now buzzing. He flinches at it. Then it cuts off.

Matthias looks back at Maira with sweat dripping from his face in relief, "Well-" Then it comes back in, bringing with it a humming a grinding noise.

”Fuck, not _again-_ ” Matthias screams as the monstrosity sprays him with a stream of soda in a straight-ass horizontal line.

Maira has already taken the warning long before Matthias ever could and dive-bombs behind the clerk counter. "Matth, _you fuck_ , you didn't turn it off?" She yells at him.

He opens his mouth to desperately defend himself but he gets nasty tasting soda in his mouth and he has to spit that out first. He's busy fighting the good fight... with a soda machine. He yells over its furious humming, "I thought I did!" What a true American hero, God bless.

She rolls her eyes at him, already dreading the intense mopping they'll have to do. "Well, apparently not well enough." Maira grumbles to herself.

The soda fountain runs its course and out of soda, leaving Matthias soaking and sad. "I washed my hair this morning." Is all he says after a few minutes. Maira bows her head for him in a moment of silence. Dearly beloved Hair Day, you will be remembered in bliss.

They pull out the mops and add that to the list of chores for today. Their day may sound hard but worse things have happened. I mean, they are two teenagers with a lot of free time. When they finally finish for the day, Maira sits on a hidden pull-out stool behind the counter and continues her window watching from earlier.

Matthias gives her a weird look. “Jeez, you look like you had a weird morning. Besides the usual of course.” His head is tilted in his version of _Gossip time? Spill._

She blows a curl of hair out of her view before it drifts back. “Yeah, you could say that."

"You find another glitter dildo on the beach?" That almost gets her to burst out a laugh, but atlas, Matthias will have to wait for another time.

She shakes her head at him with a laugh, "No. BUT, you know that weird birthmark I have?"

He raises his eyebrows, ”Yeah?”

She smirks. ”I met sentient space rocks with the same thing.” Them brows raise waaay further.

Maira watches a bird outside like what she was saying wasn't the most bizarre thing you come utter, "Yeah, it was fucking insane. Apparently, I’m like a part alien or something? Which is definitely cool!" She assures Matthias.

Matthias closes his narrowed eyes, his head shaking side to side. His lips pull in like a fish and his head-shaking starts to resemble more bobbing than nodding. His eyebrows float up into an upwards arch. "Yeah- _okay_."

"But I’m gonna find them again after work and slap some knowledge outta them.” She nods to herself, filling herself with Determination.

Matthias stares at her hard. “As you do, I guess.”

She snorts, “C’mon, there’s no way this could have ever been _just_ some human thing! Garanana has always been so touchy about it too.” She whines as she leans onto his shoulder, or at least close enough to it. Damn his unnatural (coughnormalcough) height!

He brushes a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I guess.” He slides over to her and hops up on the counter giving her a _Real Talk_ face, “What’re they like though?”

She away for a moment, absorbing herself back into her memories. “Very, different. But in an interesting way." She nods, coming back. "Basically, if they were aware of American culture they’d be walking, talking shitlords. You know, like yourself.” He flicks her right in the forehead and Maira retaliates by sticking her tongue back at him.

“I just hope they don’t run off somewhere.” She sighs softly, ”I really want to know more about where I came from, where my mom came from.”

Matthias leans back onto her, wrapping an around across her shoulders, “So what’re you still doing here then? Shouldn’t you go and talk to them now before they can go anywhere?”

She dramatically face-plants onto the table, “Yes! But I also need money!” Matthias chuckles at her.

A thought does come to mind. “Hey you know what, just leave, I’ll cover for you!” Maira throws her head back with hair flying and overly pursed lips. Melodramatic as always, the best way to live life.

“Really? You sure?” She's sceptical. As she should be.

He gives her a great smile. “Yeah man, what’re friends for?”

Oh hell no, we're not having this. “Shaving your hair off, kidnapping your dog, stealing favours for the next time they need you to do something illegal-“ she readily lists off on her fingers. They've been friends since they'd met in the sixth grade, which has given them plenty of time to get into mega fucktons of trouble. It's a very long list.

He _pfft_ s and slaps those ridiculous notions out of the air as if that was a tangible thing one could do, “Naaah.“ He drawls.

“You’ve tried to milk someone else’s cow!” She yells.

He stutters for a response but begrudgingly agrees, “That, is true-“

She slams her fists onto the counter. “And then you tried to steal it for a night on the town.“

“That is also true! _But_ -”

She's pointing at him, the discussion heating up. “And you also-”

“Okay!" He shouts, "Okay. I get it! No more mission impossible stunts. _I promise_. Go reconcile with your alien family, for Christ's sake.”

Rubbing her face, Maira hrmms at this. “You sure you got this?” She asks delicately.

“Yeah! Barely anyone comes in anyways, Mai.” That... was true. This town wasn’t known for being very busy at any time of the day. Plus, it’s not like there’s any real supervisor coming around to check things out. Ahem, City Council, ahem.

Matthias quickly jumps back down to the floor and pulls Maira off her butt, dragging her to the door, “Go! Do it already! You’ll regret it if you don’t.” “Well, yeah, but-“ “You can thank me later!” With that he pushes her through the door, a ringing going off along with it, then shutting closed.

She turns around and slumps onto the outside of the Donut shop’s window. “But I don’t know where they aarreee.” She whines through the glass outside. Matthias just makes a bunch of weird finger hands and arm waving that was probably trying to say something along the lines of ‘who cares’ and ‘just do it Shelia Beuf’. Honestly this guy though.

Maira bangs her head on the glass a few times before sliding off of it and making her way into town. She’s already untying her flannel from her waist and shrugging it on. “Should've taken a doughnut with me, I’m hungry.” She mumbles.

She walks to the nearest place to the Big Doughnut, the Boardwalk. Maira walks past the T-shirt shop, Nonno's Pizza, almost succumbs to Fryman's, arcade, and the ice cream parlour.

She trudges around Shorae City's Funland for a while (Miss Winky lookin' tired as shit. Does she know the definition of sleep?) before finally deciding to head back down to the beach edge. It was the first and last place she ever saw them so it was worth a try.

Running down a sand dune hill, she _almost_ trips and face-plants into the hot ground. “That would have been embarrassing, thank god- oof!” What the fUCK was that?

“Eat dirt, clod! Ow- my diamond.” Someone whines. But who cares about _that_ , by God is this sand nasty. Probably fucking gajillions of little tiny things all pooping and having sex up in there. She pushes herself up and spits out whatever was in her mouth, eugh.

Sitting back she rubs the back of her head, eyes only now running over what struck it, a short spear that was now degenerating. “The hell?” Maira looks behind her and spots the people responsible for it. “Oi!”

Turing towards them on her knees she can see a very disgruntled Pearl being pinched and pulled on the ear by a tall Diamond. “Hello, small human!” He greets. She pops up and half-stumbles and half-runs over to them.

“Hey! Hi, I’m so glad you’re still here! I was worried you’d leave.” She waves at them.

Diamond steps forward a few paces to meet her, pulling Pearl along with him.

He shakes his head at Maira. “Nah! We’re planning to stay here pretty permanently. So we have all the time in the world,” he pokes her side a bit, “to dissect each other all we want.” She made a few _oof_ noises, not liking just how pokey he was and swats away his hands.

“Awesome, my Diamond! So-“ she says but gets interrupted quickly.

“Hold on, hold on, you can’t call him My Diamond!” Pearl yells, sticking a finger in the air. Maira's eyes widen. Shit, is that an offensive term? Ah fuck.

“Why not?” Diamond goes poking Pearl again.

He whines. “I don’t wanna share, that’s why!”

“Alright, do you have any other names?” Maira asks.

Diamond stops attacking Pearl long enough for both of them to look to her, “Well, we have Identity Codes. How about that?" Fucking what.

"Uh, sure." She doesn't want to offend the culture so soon after learning about it.

"O-kay!" Diamon shouts with a snappy flair, resting his arms out in a T-pose, "White Diamond, Section GIL Cut B327."

Pearl shouts out next to him just as snappy, with crossed arms in a diamond insignia, "White Pearl, Section AlF Cut 374!" Maira stands in front of them awkwardly as they hold their forms. Diamond seems to glow in an aura as Pearl glows in his closed-eye smile.

“Ah, cool.” What is this, a magic-girl transformation sequence? “What’re the IDs for though?”

Diamond raises a brow down at her, "They show where we were located for incubation and popped out.” Popped- what? 

“Whoa, wait. You’re grown? Like from the ground?”

He nods at her questioningly, "Duh?"

Pearl gives her a weird look, up and down. “You’re not?”

She shakes her head at them, “I’m human so, no.” Those are some surprised looks, oh boy.

Pearl looks away muttering, bringing a hand to his chin. “I guess organics do have many weird features but you’re different from the ones on-“ He looks back at his Diamond, “Red did have a very different way of things.”

Diamond frowns with a roll of his eyes, “Well, that doesn’t matter now. It has nothing to do with us, and we have nothing to do with Homeworld. Not anymore.”

Maira looks back and forth between with with complete confusion, “Huh...” Their eyes quickly drift back to her, and Diamond laughs.

“Nothing, _nothing_. Don’t worry your tiny head over head over it!” He waves away the conversation. “What was it you had in mind again?”

Maira thinks back on the Identification Codes they gave her, “Oh yeah, names! Since you have none why don’t I give you two honorary Earthen ones?” She wiggles around in pizzazz as the gems nod excitingly.

“How about, Gilbert,” She points at Diamond, “and Alfred?” now at Pearl. Gilbert’s eyes lit up.

“Yes, I love that!” He squeals, “Is this how every human is identified? Do you learn this for future practices or are you made just knowing?”

Maira giggles at him and shakes her head, “Nah, I just came up with them. But you’re cool with those right?”

They both look at each other and mouth their own names. “Yes.” They decide.

“Awesome. So, Alfred, Gilbert," She nods at them, "what else is there to know about gems?”


	3. Dumb, dumber and Matthew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that Maira has wrangled and befriended Gilbert and Alfred it's time she meet the last member of their squad!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who took several months trying to figure out why this chapter didn't work only to realize I needed to split it into two :)))

"I'm... dealing with a bunch of idiots." It's something one would say when dealing with a bunch of fucking idiots. Thankfully, these two are like actual adult-sized children, so it's rightfully justified for Maira to say.

Alfred jumps into the air with a, uh, kick? "Hai- _yahh_!" It doesn't have much form so it could be anything, really.

He's been striking pose after pose with Gilbert, who's making exaggerated facial expressions. "Ohhhhh-" The three of them just finished one of Maira's _Kungfu Kid_ movies, the good one with Jaden Smith.

And while Alfred and Gilbert have been... mindful about their range of motion, "Ja- _heee_ ," Maira's pretty sure, sooner or later, there's going to be a body tumbling over her small balcony fence. But I mean, let idiots be idiots, you know?

Maira sighs and fails dramatically before laying out on her beaten down couch. She really wanted to ask more about their life as gems, but she's scared about it being rude. So far, she's been able to pick up on the fact that they're hitchhikers, looking for a new place to call home. It sounds weird considering that they look like they're both from rich families. Like, _really_ rich judging from their outfits.

 _Wait. Do gems even have families?_ Maira wonders. Gilbert and Alfred had looked so surprised when a seven-year-old and her baby brother ran by them along the beachside. _Holy crow, what if they've never been outside before? Forced in by horrible families-_

"Bismuth Maira!" A shout interrupts her train of thought, "We demand more of this weird concoction of... _fruit juice_." Alfred waves around his and Gilbert's cups. Thank goddess they're empty, she was not cleaning that mess up.

"What do we say?" She asks them.

Alfred looks down at his cup for a long moment before erupting into a shout, "Cheese and bake- _thank_ you!"

"Close enough," Maira sighs. For some reason, it seems like gems didn't have basic manners, so that's been a bit of caution. She'd have to remember to apologize to Misses Winky the next time they run into each other. _Better late than never._

Maira gets up and has them collect their trash, watching as they almost make the mess bigger every time they set down the trash bag. There is no doubt in her mind that they've never cleaned anything in their life before. Not even _once_.

The gems follow behind her and do the wee wee dance as she opens the fridge and pulls out whatever was left of the juice and pours them their refills. "You guys are running me into the dirt," She mutters indifferently.

They give one another confused looks. "But we're not running? Or outside by the dirt." Gilbert perks a brow at her.

Maira chuckles, "It's just a human phrase. It means you're draining me of my stuff. In this case, juice." She shakes the cartoon at him.

"Huh." They watch as she takes the last splash left for herself and chucks the empty packaging into the bin.

Now with their refills, they head back to the living room to settle on the floor under the couch. Maira climbs up and over them like a monkey to get to her own spot and flops onto the cushions. A rerun of Highschool Musical 3 had started and she rolls her eyes at how much more garbage Troy's personality had become with every sequel.

 _This is probably the best time if ever._ Maira turns down the TV. "So," She draws. "Whatcha guys doing here? It kind of sounds like you're on the run from someone." Neither of them move, Gilbert continues to stare at the TV and Alfred leans towards his Diamond.

"Welp," Gil slaps his thigh, "There's much to tell you. I'm not sure about humans but gems are created to fill a job. I didn't fit mine so they let me go! I'm sure they'll have a new gem in by sometime next, uhh," He scratches his neck. "century?"

"Whoa- Wait, wait, wait, _what_?" Maira waves her hands around frantically. "How old are you guys?" Gilbert rests his head next to Maira's feet to give her an uncomfortably confused gaze.

Gilbert looks at Alfred and Alfred shrugs. "I don't know how to translate that to human measures," Alfred says. "You'd have to ask our Amethyst, cuz he's the most knowledgeable out of the three of us." He shrugs it off with a subtle distaste in his voice.

She stares deep into his sinful, if existing, soul. "Who, the fuck, is Amethyst?" Maira asks slowly.

Gilbert looks back to her with surprise, "Oh, um. I guess we kind of forgot about him, huh?" Alfred's face scrunches up and he throws his hands up sarcastically.

Gilbert slaps his Pearl's face lightly, "Where is he? Bring him outright- He's probably sitting in there having a fuss, _my stars_!" Alfred groans as he flops over before hovering his hand above his shoulder gem that has begun to glow.

Maira leans over to get a better look at whatever he was doing, " _What_? What are you- _holy crow_!" His only warning to her is a brief flash of fierce white light and out materializes a sizable purple gemstone. He picks it up with his index and thumb fingers and plops it into Gilbert's open hand with a grumble.

Gil grasps it gently, "Amethyst, you poor Nova. I can't believe we forgot about you... again." He groans with relative guilt. Maira stares at the stone in amazement, but as they as stare at it for an increasingly long time Alfred brushes off the appearance like this is their normal Tuesday. Well, now that she thinks about it, it probably is.

"Is he... alright?" Maira asks after the clock has shown them to be waiting for five minutes now. They look at her with raised brows but are quick to wave her off.

"Yeah, he's just being a big old pissy-baby," Alfred answers, already using the remote to search through Maria's Netflix listing.

She shoves a few stray strands of hair out of her sight, face pinched with confusion and worry. "No, I mean _where's his body_?" She's not crazy- there's no person there! _Nothing, nada, zilch!_

"Well, duh! He's in his gemstone," Gilbert laughs. Alfred follows him, wheezing like he's heard the funniest joke in the Universe.

"That's all there is of you when you're poofed, ya clod." Alfred z-snaps at her with a surplus of sass, something she's beginning to see was a mistake to teach him.

Maira gasps, "I'm not a- a clod!" _What the heck is a clod?_ "Humans don't do that at _all_. You're the real clod here, Alfred!" Maira pokes him hard between the eyes and enjoys watching him squeal in distress.

Gilbert pokes Maira in the sides, feeling her squishy human tummy with a gasp. "Whoa, you can't drop this form?" He pokes more at her stomach, baffled at how a human could do anything with a form as soft and delicate as _this_.

Maira slaps his hand away, "No, we're born with a smaller version of this body that grows as we age and we're stuck with it until we die." Alfred makes a move to pinch her arm. "Stop that! _Personal bubble_ -" She forms a round barrier with her hands and he tries to find it's supposed edge with bulging eyes and panicked hands.

Gilbert pulls Maira's hand towards him. At her questioning gaze he informs her, "Well, you've never held a gem's gemstone before, so here. Just be gentle." And with that, she's now holding an Amethyst gem.

This gemstone is... really pretty. It's mostly made of different waves of purple with white frothy accents gliding around its edges here and black banded accents there, cut with five plane slants for sides and two flat plates, one its front and the other its back. Maira wonders what kind of person lays inside. If Earth culture can tell her anything, they must either be very wise or can hold their own in a battle of shots.

Alfred grabs the Amethyst suddenly, yanking it out of Maira's hands to tap it repeatedly on the edge of her coffee table, "Wake up sleepy head!" He yells at it. The gemstone glows vividly and there's an abrupt flash that spews forth a wave of light, whisking the gem from Alfred's fist with fury.

In an instant, the light transforms from a bright, painful beaming ball of energy into a roughly controlled large blob, the actual gemstone drifting upwards in the swarm. It rapidly bleeds out more photons and glows furiously as the light forms into more like limbs and a torso and a head all in different shades of lilac.

More finished touches start developing too, like some shoulder-length hair pulled away from a heart-shaped face by a short ribbon. A sleeved tunic that ripples down longer in the back with an asymmetrical cut that flows down lightly with gravity. Another ribbon curls around a strong waist that's set higher than first thought thanks to a pair of mid-calf boots. All with an Amethyst gemstone sitting gracefully in the center of the stomach of the gem who know stands on Maira's coffee table.

In the next instant, however, a foot propelles itself straight into Alfred's poor, unsuspecting face. " _Fuck_!" He screams, something he's quickly picked up from Maira. Ya'know, Maira, the one who's currently holding still on her couch and freaking the frick _out_. Gilbert only sits there with an ever-bored sigh, the asshole.

The Amethyst rights himself with fury running through his veins, or whatever the gem equivalent is. "Don't touch me, you horrid excuse for an accessory!" He hollers at Alfred and, _boy oh boy_ , he does not look happy.

" _Holy shit_ -" Maira mumbles.

The Amethyst looks to her with a mock expression, "Hoky shift-" And that's the moment he realises that he's never seen her before. "Wait, who are you?" He asks, on guard again with eye narrowed and looking around the apartment for any danger. Or this room for that matter...

 _Say something - defuse the situation!_ "Uhh..." Great conversation from her, as always.

Gilbert snaps his fingers twice, calling the attention of the aggravated gem. "Amethyst, welcome back! This is Maira.'' He doesn't bother physically referring to her since it's pretty obvious she's the only person he could possibly be talking about. "After Alfred ran you over with the ship, we were forced to walk around the area without you. We ended up running into her when Pearl tried to fight with one of the lower organisms. Cool, right?" He threw his hands around excitedly as he ranted.

This new gem throws his head back and groans, "I cannot believe you two." Alfred and Gilbert share an anxious look as the Amethyst breathes in deeply with his eyes closed and pinches his nose. He cannot even begin to fathom what goes on in these two's heads. He's gone for, what? Two vain, maybe a cycle, an entire unit, perhaps? And they manage to royally muck things up this much! " _First of all_ ," Here we go- The other two gems bow their heads down in habitat as Amethyst gears up for a lecture. He breathes in again, letting his mind structure his words to get his anger across.

"You," He points to the Diamond with animosity, but his voice is as soft as a smoothie made from puppies and a newborn's behind that Maira almost misses it. "have the _audacity_ to assigned me as your chauffeur, _and yet_ , let your Pearl take up the controls to a highly advanced prototype, only for him to then _eject me_ from said ship and run me _clear over with it_." Gilbert smiles towards him with an apology prepared on his lips but the Amethyst is nowhere near done.

"And _then_ ," He punctuates his words harshly. "you two go and- and- _what_? Did you _crash land_ here?" Gilbert and Alfred look down solemnly, avoiding the Amethyst's eyes. "You crash land and just, _oh_ , you just deci-ide that leaving the ship and wandering around the planet wasn't _dangerous_? That the very reason we've been orbiting from the atmosphere - making sure that there were no leftover threats - wasn't _relevant_ anymore? Is that it!" He grunts softly, but it's painfully rhetorical.

Gil raises his hand up slowly, the image of it looks no different from an unknowing kindergartner that still has many things to say, "We didn't have-" He tries to start.

"No, apparently _not_." Amethyst cuts back in, completely ignoring whatever he has to say. "Because you go and try to fight something! And now, _you've_ \- you've just made _friends_ with the organic life? They could be lethal for all we know!" Gilbert and Alfred sit quietly as they wait for their Amethyst to calm down.

"What clod goes and does that!" He tears at his hair, absolutely ready to claw his eyes out. Amethyst is on the edge of cracking himself, honestly these two. How his Diamond is even still alive and well today is a mystery to him. Alfred smirks silently to himself like the little devil he is and Maira rolls her eyes at him. At the very least, Gilbert has the decency to try and look guilty about his actions. "What the _quasar_ is an Alfred?" Amethyst's eyes narrow once more in question.

And of course, that opens another can of worms, "Why- _me_ , of course!" Alfred throws his head back like some kind of a valley girl. _Disgustingly cute_. "It's my new name, Ame."

Amethyst looks at him. Just, looks at him. _Him_. "Of course. Out of all experiences in this universe that could use a newly specific word to describe them, it has to relate to you." He closes his eyes, shutting out the sight of the gloating Pearl. "It sounds absolutely awful."

Alfred raises his finger in a waggle and tuts it at him, "Well, _I_ for one like it! It's based on our ICs. Our Diamond has one too - it's Gilbert - doesn't it sound cool? You should let Maira do it for you too. She's the one that made them for us and they are absolutely lovely." He turns to her and gives off a wink. She _awh_ s and waves him off with a smile.

Amethyst, on the other hand, is obviously upset. He squats down so quickly that the table's glass center gives a squeak in resistance to him as it slides against the wood framing.

"Amethyst," Gilbert coos.

Amethyst crosses his arms tightly around his knees, now that he sits on the coffee table. He looks a lot calmer though, his expression has melted from animosity to... Begrudgingly content? Despite that first impression, Maira can say with certainty this gem is the softest person she's ever seen. He doesn't puff up with anger or hate when Gilbert sits on top of the coffee table next to him. (And Maira ignores the potential damage of the furniture.)

"Amethyst, I did not mean to-" The Diamond looks pained as he rubs the other gem's shoulder. "We can get so excited and I see how that upsets you. I'm sorry for that," He apologies.

Amethyst slides onto the floor and slumps his face onto the sofa. "It's fine." He says in the softest grumble.

"No, it was not. I should have listened to you." Gilbert sighs and smothers back Amethyst's hair. "It was rude of us to do that and Pearl is awfully horrible at steering."

"Hey," Alfred cries.

Amethyst doesn't try to hide his snort, "Agreeable."

" _Hey_ ," Alfred cries again.

Maira rolls her eyes at the three of them, all complete children. "You guys know you can sit up here with me right?" She pats the seats next to her on the couch. Gilbert shrugs and Alfred only goes wherever his Diamond does, so that just leaves Amethyst.

He looks up at her silently for a moment before taking her offer. "So," He unwinds slowly. "What's this about changing our Identity Codes?" He asks, now calm and soft-voiced.

Maira hums, "Well, most humans aren't really named after gems. And it sounds like you guys have multiple of each gem?" He nods. "Yeah, so I thought having your own name would be nice!"

"Okay, well," He sits up straight and crosses his arms into a diamond, "Amethyst M477 Cut H3W at your service. What would my name be?"

Maira thinks for a second, "Matthew is a good one- _Oh, oh_! And Matt as a nickname. What do you think?" She turns to him.

"That's nice actually." He mumbles the name to himself much like Alfred and Gilbert did with their own names earlier. "I like it, thank you." _Matthew_ smiles and she beams right back at him.

They all sit there watching TV but Maira couldn't help thinking how the fuck did she get here. Taking care of, now _three_ , illegal literal aliens. From the looks of it, they're functional without any food or water or air and she's pretty sure they don't have intestines.

"So you guys, like, don't fuck right?" They all look at her curiously, "To reproduce or anything- no?" Matthew shakes his head no which Gilbert and Alfred take it as a sigh to copy him.


End file.
